In a stunning development, yet another team is going to throw several million dollars at Milton Bradley. This time, the Rangers are the ones clinging to the notion that a change in scenery is all Boardgame needs to quit being such an asshole so he can focus on playing baseball.
From a purely baseball standpoint, the argument for signing Bradley goes, “Get guys with talent and hope they stay healthy,” which is a reasonable point-of-view depending on who it is you’re talking about. Hoping Milton Bradley stays healthy is like a kid hoping Santa Claus is real and he’s gonna bring him a pony with a built in Wii that shits Snoopy Snow Cones. He’s played more than 101 games in a season only once, 2004 with LA (in which he actually posted his 2nd lowest OPS of his career) and he actually has a lifetime OPS below .800 (.797), though for a centerfielder it’s still solid.
He’s only 29 and when healthy, flashes the talent that screams “upside.” He absolutely raked after being acquired by San Diego last year. But with Bradley, it’s never “if,” just when.
He got ran out of Cleveland because he couldn’t get along with his manager.
He got ran out of LA because he couldn’t get along with his teammates. And he chucked a soda bottle at a fan. And he freaked out, took his jersey off and threw a bucket of baseballs all over the field. And he told the media that Jeff Kent can’t relate to black people. And he called LA Times reporter J.A. Adande an “Uncle Tom” (clearly demonstrating to Kent how to properly relate to black people.) And he had the cops show up for domestic violence.
His stint with Oakland was tame by his standards, though accompanied by the requisite injuries that kept him out almost half the year in 06. He was dealt to San Diego and seemed to be thriving until a classic game when he not only took Padre centerfielder Mike Cameron out with a spike to the hand in an outfield collision, but tore his own ACL, ending his season, while being restrained from showing umpire Mike Winters how to relate to his right fist.
Bradley and his manager claimed Winters baited him and, as it turned out, he probably did, given Winters was suspended the last 5 games of the season and the playoffs. But for a guy like Bradley, it’s just reinforcement for him that everyone’s out to get him. That it’s always someone else’s fault that he can’t control himself. Yet, as in most cases in professional sports, another few million dollars are just a couple of agent’s phone calls away.
When asked about the acquisition of Bradley, Texas reliever Frank Francisco said, “Bottle? Shit bitch, call me when he chucks a chair at a fan.”
When asked about Bradley and Francisco throwing shit into the stands at them, both fans said “We’re just glad Bud Black didn’t hold us back from kicking their asses.”
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